Today, it’s 5 degrees warmer in Benicia, CA. I’m sitting here, in my couch-bed, watching a show about cocaine and Florida on Netflix. I can barely understand what they’re saying because my husband has the volume on low. I’m stoned on Runtz, eating two day old mohingar (catfish soup), while I contemplate the fate of my 5 month old cough. There’s an empty Yakult bottle next to me. It’s propped on top of a Native Seed hoodie and an empty plastic can of Venom OG. Truth be told, I haven’t smoked in a while – not since two weeks ago – and I’m contemplating how I can still type when the Runtz is making me feel a little stupid. I’ve always liked feeling heavy due to Celiac related insomnia. With it a feeling of constant anxiety. It’s crippling and it stirs me away from positive thoughts, and productivity. Smoking weed helps. It helps a lot. When it can’t (because I can’t smoke in my room) I consider taking Benadryl.